Hey Mommas, future Mommas, and soon to be Mommas.

Last week, Rob was picking up Averie from daycare. While I was at work, he called me to let me know something happened. So I panicked a little but kept it cool and asked calmly, “What happened”? He begins to tell me that, when picking up Averie from school he noticed that she looked upset in the playground area. She walked across from him at the water fountain station and began to cry. He asked her what happened?

Backstory

Early that day we got a notification on Class Dojo (If you don’t know, its an app where parents and teachers can communicate) that Averie was the only child to pass the state exam for VPK with a perfect score.

So Rob asked her one more time, “What is wrong Averie?” She now begins to cry and then ugly cry. (You know when the boogers just come out- that’s when you know whatever was bothering really affected her) She begins to tell him while taking deep breaths, “The twins… called me… a DUMB IDIOT!” Begins to cry softly.

As they get into the car, they called me. I could hear Averie weeping quietly and I asked her version of the story. It’s exactly the same. But I wanted to reassure her that I heard it from her mouth not Daddy’s. Deep down inside I was crushed while listening to her tell me the story. How did this just happened? She must’ve asked the twins how they did in their exam. Because that’s who Averie is, she likes to help and loves to learn from others and they crushed it for her. This idea was just running in my head. How do I explain to my child that what others say should not be taken to the heart.

So I calmly tell her, “Averie, sometimes kids will be mean because they do not know how to express themselves. They can be frustrated and the words they choose come out rude. They may not be thinking at that moment. And yes, words can hurt. But remember that in the end of the day, the only people that matter are…. FAMILY. We don’t see you as a dumb idiot. Your are wonderful, beautiful and smart. You are beyond your years. Don’t let her bring you down. Hold your head up! I will see you soon after I get out from work.”

As I told her those words, I tried to hold my own tears and be strong for her. Because this was my first time that I wasn’t there to help her.

When I got home, the first thing I did was to go lay in bed with her. I asked her how she was feeling and she told me better. But in the back of my mind, I knew I had to write her a little note for school as I do everyday. But this time I wanted to tell her how special she truly is to me.

At 6 AM I wrote: Don’t worry about what other kids say. You are smart, beautiful, nice and FABU-LOUS! (Inside joke: she likes to mimic Lamb Lamb from Doc Mcstuffins) Hold your head high. YOU ARE A QUEEN! And ONLY YOU wears the crown! – Love Mom *Excuse my butchering of words, 6 AM and still half asleep*

You are also wondering, does she even read this note? And the answer to that is YES. The teacher sees her reading each note everyday. She has mentioned that is the first time she sees a little girl at her age reading and hugging the note from us. I think it’s a great inspirational note half way through her day.

So with that said, nobody tells you that parenting is easy. It’s a hard job and I wish I could protect her always. But I know she will learn and grow from this experience. With tougher skin.

-The Mominista